well just an update....on the "big match". I did it again...sorta. I blew up on the front shooting a 54 and then on the back i shot a 44. I parred 16 after losing a tee shot in the woods. and the 17 also. At that point though i just din't care anymore. I think i finally realized that maybe i am not as good as maybe i thought i was. which is a horrible feeling to have. so now i don't really know where to go from here. i just need to be able to take my swing from the range to the course and until i do that, i won't ever be as good as i think i am