The Book of Golf

golfseeker · #1 (**permalink**) 02-05-2008, 05:42 PM

The Book of Golf (If you happened to lose your copy)

Chapter 1 - How to Properly Line Up Your Fourth Putt
Chapter 2 - How to Hit a Nike from the Rough When You Hit a Titleist from the Tee
Chapter 3 - How to Avoid the Water When You Lie 8 in a Bunker
Chapter 4 - How to Get More Distance Off the Shank
Chapter 5 - Using Your Shadow on the Greens to Maximize Earnings
Chapter 6 - Crying and How to Handle it
Chapter 7 - How to Rationalize a 6 Hour Round
Chapter 8 - How to Find That Ball That Everyone Else Saw Go in the Water
Chapter 9 - Why Your Spouse Doesn't Care That You Birdied the 5th
Chapter10 - How to Let a Foursome Play Through Your Twosome
Chapter 11 - How to Relax When You Are Hitting Three Off the Tee
Chapter 12 - When to Suggest Major Swing Corrections to Your Opponent
Chapter 13 - God and the Meaning of the Birdie-to-Bogey Three Putt
Chapter 14 - When to Regrip Your Ball Retriever

Have a great day!
GolfSeeker

BrianW · #2 (**permalink**) 02-05-2008, 06:31 PM

I posted this once before but seems apt:

THE REAL, TRUE AND UN-EXAGGERATED RULES OF GOLF
1. If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age.
2. The game of golf is 90 percent mental and 10 percent mental.
3. Since bad shots come in groups of three, a fourth bad shot is actually the beginning of the next group of three.
4. When you look up and cause an awful shot, you will always look down again at exactly the moment when you ought to start watching the ball if you ever want to see it again.
5. Any change works for a maximum of three holes and a minimum of not at all.
6. No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse.
7. Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing.
8. When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.
9. If you’re afraid a full shot might reach the green while the foursome ahead of you is still putting out, you have two options: you can immediately shank a lay-up, or you can wait until the green is clear and top a ball halfway there.
10. The less skilled the player, the more likely he is to share his ideas about the golf swing.
11. The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant elimination of the one critical unconscious motion that allowed you to compensate for all your errors.
12. If it ain’t broke, try changing your grip.
13. Golfers who say they don’t cheat, also lie.
14. Everyone replaces his divot after a perfect approach shot.
15. A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponent’s luck.
16. It’s surprisingly easy to hole a 50-foot putt on your tenth shot.
17. Counting on your opponent to inform you when he breaks a rule is like expecting him to make fun of his own haircut.
18. Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts.
19. It’s not a gimme if you’re still 4 foot away.
20. The shortest distance between any two points on a golf course is a straight line that passes directly through the center of a very large tree.
21. There are two kinds of bounces: unfair bounces, and bounces just the way you meant to play it.
22.You can hit a 2-acre fairway 10 percent of the time and a 2-inch branch 90 percent of the time.
23. Every time a golfer makes a birdie, he must subsequently make two triple bogeys to restore the fundamental equilibrium of the universe.
24. If you want to hit a 7-iron as far as Tiger Woods does, simply try to lay up just short of a water hazard.
25. To calculate the speed of a player’s downswing, multiply the speed of his backswing by his handicap. (Example: backswing 20 mph, handicap 15, downswing 600 mph.)
26. There are two things you can learn by stopping your backswing at the top and checking the position of your hands. It’s how many hands you have, and which one is wearing the glove.
27. Hazards attract; fairways repel.
28. You can put “draw” on the ball, you can put “fade” on the ball, but no golfer can put “straight” on the ball.
29. A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.
30. If there is a ball in the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker.
31. If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint.
32. Don’t buy a putter until you’ve had a chance to throw it and it floats.

mtcheljon · #3 (**permalink**) 04-11-2008, 06:11 AM

Book of golf was well written to give us ready-made golf fitness programs, exercises, step-by-step instructions and illustrations which can quickly transform our golf game.
http://www.officialgolftrainingaids....ple-golf-swing

qassim · #4 (**permalink**) 04-11-2008, 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by golfseeker

The Book of Golf (If you happened to lose your copy)

Chapter 1 - How to Properly Line Up Your Fourth Putt
Chapter 2 - How to Hit a Nike from the Rough When You Hit a Titleist from the Tee
Chapter 3 - How to Avoid the Water When You Lie 8 in a Bunker
Chapter 4 - How to Get More Distance Off the Shank
Chapter 5 - Using Your Shadow on the Greens to Maximize Earnings
Chapter 6 - Crying and How to Handle it
Chapter 7 - How to Rationalize a 6 Hour Round
Chapter 8 - How to Find That Ball That Everyone Else Saw Go in the Water
Chapter 9 - Why Your Spouse Doesn't Care That You Birdied the 5th
Chapter10 - How to Let a Foursome Play Through Your Twosome
Chapter 11 - How to Relax When You Are Hitting Three Off the Tee
Chapter 12 - When to Suggest Major Swing Corrections to Your Opponent
Chapter 13 - God and the Meaning of the Birdie-to-Bogey Three Putt
Chapter 14 - When to Regrip Your Ball Retriever

Have a great day!
GolfSeeker

Good work Golfseeker ! When is volume 2 coming out?!

ReefBoy · #5 (**permalink**) 04-13-2008, 10:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by golfseeker

The Book of Golf (If you happened to lose your copy)

Chapter 1 - How to Properly Line Up Your Fourth Putt
Chapter 2 - How to Hit a Nike from the Rough When You Hit a Titleist from the Tee
Chapter 3 - How to Avoid the Water When You Lie 8 in a Bunker
Chapter 4 - How to Get More Distance Off the Shank
Chapter 5 - Using Your Shadow on the Greens to Maximize Earnings
Chapter 6 - Crying and How to Handle it
Chapter 7 - How to Rationalize a 6 Hour Round
Chapter 8 - How to Find That Ball That Everyone Else Saw Go in the Water
Chapter 9 - Why Your Spouse Doesn't Care That You Birdied the 5th
Chapter10 - How to Let a Foursome Play Through Your Twosome
Chapter 11 - How to Relax When You Are Hitting Three Off the Tee
Chapter 12 - When to Suggest Major Swing Corrections to Your Opponent
Chapter 13 - God and the Meaning of the Birdie-to-Bogey Three Putt
Chapter 14 - When to Regrip Your Ball Retriever

Have a great day!
GolfSeeker

Thanks for the heads up, but I have already got all of those aspects of the game down pat.

Christopher

mtcheljon · #6 (**permalink**) 04-29-2008, 06:25 AM

Thanks for the valuable suggestion on book of golf.
http://www.officialgolftrainingaids....le-golf-swing/

Mox · #7 (**permalink**) 04-29-2008, 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by golfseeker

The Book of Golf (If you happened to lose your copy)

Chapter 13 - God and the Meaning of the Birdie-to-Bogey Three Putt

I had the steroid version of Chapter 13 last week. Our greenkeeper had it in for us.

We have a short par3 - 96meters/107yards or so - with a tricky green. The green slopes towards the front and the left side, quite a lot. However, the green has a slight hill on the right side as well as behind the green, and they slope in the same direction, giving the impression of a green that is fairly level, when in fact it is quite slanted.

Pin was on a crest on the left side of the green.

I hit a great tee-shot, 3/4 of a 9i. But dropped 2 meters to the right of the stick and stayed there.
From there, I hit a very soft putt. So soft in fact, that I was certain it would never make it to the hole and have a shot at the birdie. But it just kept rolling and rolling at a constant, very slow, speed. Missed the hole by an inch and kept going ... off the green ... down the hill ... some 10 meters.

Needless to say, I was appauled.

Used the texas wedge to get back on the dancefloor, this time about 3 feet from the hole ... past the hole ... above the hole.

Putting for bogey, I panicked and hit it fat. My putter bouncing off the grass and hardly putting the ball in motion at all.

It did roll ... veeeeery slowly ... end over end ... taking what seemed to be several seconds ... to roll off the edge of the cup, gain momentum, and continue off the green ... down the hill again.

Texas wedge from 10 meters out again to the green. This time keeping the ball below the hole.

Then a putt for a triple bogey.

Five-putting for a triple bogey.

Mental note to self: No tips for the greenkeeper - ever!

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